Rizzles -- Dangerous
by jrizzoli
Summary: Jane Rizzoli gets a chance to ride first class in a plane to New York and that is where her life changed extraordinarily. She meets Maura Isles, a medical student who she finds rather interesting but the girl refuses to believe her. So they go on an adventure until sunrise for Jane to prove that Maura is interesting by the time they part ways. What happens next?
1. Chapter 1

Dangerous.

**_First time writing something for this fandom (too shy sorry)_**

**_ please forgive me if there are any mistakes, i wrote this on my phone because if i used my laptop my parents would ask what i'm writing (school doesn't start till june 23rd in my place)_**

**_ Maura's outfits: _**

**_• justalittle-blog(.tumblr.)com/ post/56486594027_**

**_• piquetures(.tumblr.)com/post/76030986859_**

**_ Jane's outfit:_**

**_• cityfashionn(.tumblr.)com/post/46003706044_** (jane's wearing skinny black pants instead of leggings)

* * *

Hello, my name is Jane Rizzoli. Let me tell you about the day my life changed tremendously.

November 27th, 2013 - 11:04 AM

My mother won a first-class ticket for a trip to New York and she insisted that I go to explore the city, go on a vacation. She asked me with a weak smile on her face and the saddest of eyes. I knew the reason why she handed it to me, it's because she felt bad. She feels guilty that I'm wasting my life sitting down next to a hospital bed watching over a heart rate monitor that is close to giving out. It's been two years since the last time I've went out to another place besides our home, the gym and the hospital. Every night, I would walk the same path, ten blocks away, to my home. I would meet the same people on the streets and they all would give me greetings and smiles filled with sympathy. An old man who sells hotdogs on the sidewalk would hand me down a can of Pepsi and one of his specials without charging me a dime, whatever I had left, I would give it to a homeless man that lived in the alley beside our apartment. Before I slept, I prepared a gym bag full of clothes and essentials I needed for the following morning.

In the morning, I would jog to the gym, that was standing right across the hospital, and I would do some sets of sit-ups and jumping jacks. After my warm-up, I would put on my pair of black boxing gloves and release every frustration I had on a punching bag.

It was the only way I would remain calm. When I was younger, my hands were bruised all the way from my fingers to my wrists. I had a problem with my life. Everything thing a person felt, I would feel much more stronger and deeper. I didn't know who I am. One moment, I would be in a euphoria of happiness and the next I'm in agonizing pain within a flash. My thoughts were filled with various thoughts of suicide and harm. All I thought about was how much I hate myself and how much I didn't deserve to breathe. Ar the same time, I thought that my life is amazing and it is worth more to live it. I was either the best or the worst, there wasn't any in-between. Those thoughts still continued until the moment I got on the plane.

I've never ridden in first class before. The surroundings were all new to my vision, I didn't belong in it. I was part of a blue collar family in Boston, nothing more.

I took my seat and looked out of the window. I watched all the other passengers get in the plane until the very last one. A voice filled my ears and it became louder as the seconds passed by. I turned my head and saw a blonde talking on the phone with somebody and making her way towards the seat just next to me. She seemed stressed out and tired. Her honey blonde hair was down and some strands were braided to the side to make her hair look like a waterfall. She was wearing a black long-sleeved blouse that was tucked into her dark denim shorts. She wore a pair of black aviator sunglasses that were Ray Ban's and a brown Prada bag was hung on her shoulder.

"I know that all the flights are full, Mother," she said to the person on the other line. It's her mother. "Yes, I was able to book a flight at the last minute."

She frowned and sat down.

"I'm just taking a break, Mother," she groaned. "No, I understand. I'm not using a tone, I'm sorry. I will be back in Boston within two to three weeks. Yes, I have my books with me-"

A pause.

"Good bye, Mother," she sighed and hung up the phone.

She laid back on the seat and put her thumbs to her temples. Her eyes closed and she stayed like that for a few minutes. By the looks of this girl, she's obviously wealthy. By the time she's calmed down, she sat up straight and pulled out a book from her bag.

It seemed to me that she was oblivious to her surrounds and lost in her thoughts. I wondered what went on with that girl, what her story is about and why she needed a vacation. To her, she was the only person on the plane. Just herself and her Biology book. It didn't bother me that she had yet to notice my presence, I was used to it. I was used to ignorance. Never was I the popular girl in school nor was I even known for anything. I didn't complain, I liked being alone. Nothing could harm me. The only people who ever acknowledged me was my family and it didn't push through, anyway. This wasn't new to me. It was just a normal day.

Twenty minutes had passed by and I ran out of things to distract myself. Everywhere I look is no longer new to me. I can tolerate not having any attention, as long as there was something to distract me. That plane was nothing like school or the gym. It wasn't even like the hospital. And that moment, I've ran out of options. I've went through everything there is to that plane and the only thing left was the girl next to me.

She wasn't sleeping, I knew that. I could see her fingers flipping the pages of her book. I wondered for a few seconds if she would be friendly or just like the other people in her class, snobbish.

I took a deep breath and looked out the window then back to her. I shifted a bit on my seat and cleared my throat. That seemed to startle her and she turned her attention to me. I let out a nervous giggle and she smiled at me.

A smile, that's good. I thought to myself.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you," I lied.

She closed her book and shifted her position to face me then she held out her hand and smiled warmly, "I'm Jane, by the way. Jane Rizzoli."

"That's okay, I'm Maura Isles," she introduced herself and we shook hands. "I didn't notice I had company, I'm sorry."

"Oh, don't worry. It's only been, like, twenty minutes," I joked and she blushed a little. "So, heading off to New York?"

"Yes, I just wanted to take some time off from University," she held up her book and put it back down on her lap. "How about you?"

"Well, my mother won a trip to New York," I leaned back on my seat. "So, that's where I'm going."

Maura bit her lip and fumbled with her thumbs. She's very nice, by the means of how we met. I hoped that it wasn't the only time I'll get to see her.

"You seem very," I bit my lip and thought of the word best suiting. "Interesting."

"Thank you but I'm really not. Most people call me boring," she looked down and I raised my eyebrow. "I'm not interesting."

"You're not like most of these people sitting with us right now," I whispered so nobody would over hear and get offended. "That's pretty interesting."

She just shrugged at me and I crossed my arms. "Got any plans for NYC?"

"No," she shook her head. "It's kind of a last minute idea."

A give her a mischievous grin and thought of a wild idea. My imagination is very vivid. My mind could go on for miles with its marvelous and crazy ideas. Ideas that would just make everything better.

"How about this," I leaned closer to her. "When this plane lands in ten or fifteen minutes, we hang out together and I will tell you if you're interesting or not when it's time for us to part ways?"

This made her think for a moment and she gave me a few questions until I got an actual answer, but not for the question I asked earlier.

"How sure am I you're safe?" She asked. "You might be a drug dealer or a kidnapper."

"Do I look like I'm danger?" I posed for her.

"Yes," she answered. I mocked an offended expression and she worried. I giggled and asked why. "But in all the right ways."

"Like?" I challenged her. "What kind of danger would I bring to you, Maura Isles?"

"Your charm," she shrugged. "People would easily fall for it."

"So you're saying I'm flirting with you?"

Maura shook her head and shoved her book in her bag. She leaned closer to me so we would be face-to-face and made it easier to have a conversation.

"No, I'm saying that you are very attractive and anybody could be lured by your appearance and words. Even me," she said liked there was nothing to it. But it got my attention even more. "We can't avoid these things from occurring, Jane. All we can do is make the most out of it and see what's in store for us next."

Her words stood by me for a long time. Thoughts of what was happening with my life flooded my mind when she said that. All the tragedies that have happened and was happening in that time, I couldn't avoid them. This girl was right. The only thing was, I didn't know how to make the most out of things. _How could I make the_ _most out of a dying brother?_

* * *

When the plane landed and we waited for our bags or luggage, in Maura's case, we got to know more about each-other. Like how Maura wanted to be a Medical Examiner when she finishes her studies Medical School. This girl made me feel very comfortable around her. She knew how to carry a conversation, she listened to the things I said and would fill me up on a lot of information that explained why something happened or why it's happening. Maura filled me with delight and she had proven that she is nothing but boring. If only she saw that. Maura knew everything there is to know about the world but she didn't know what there is to her. I wanted to show her. I wanted to show a person who I had just met forty minutes earlier what it is that made me find her interesting. I wanted to show her what made her exciting and worth the time, even if I didn't know how to do it to myself.

"You haven't given me an answer to my proposition," I smirked. "Although, it already seems like it's a yes."

She crossed her arms and I put my hands in my pocket. Maura tilted her head and smiled. She turned back to the bags that were passing by us on the belt and gave me an answer.

"Why not," she said. "What's a little danger?"

I crossed my arms and raise my eyebrow at her.

"The good kind," she added and waited for her things to show up in the belt.

I shook my head and did the same.

My smile grew wider by the moment and we left off once we had our bags.

Before we could actually start our little adventure she insisted that we check in a hotel. I had a little discomfort regarding her idea. Mostly because I didn't have enough money. What she aimed for was a five star luxury hotel when I only had enough money for a middle class bed and breakfast, or something like that. She noticed the discomfort in my face and she didn't ask why. She knew why.

"I can get us a room with two beds. Nothing fancy. That's it," Maura suggested. "Just a regular twin room. Not a duplex or a suite or anything more."

I looked down to my dirty old chucks and play with my thumbs. She placed her hand on my should and frowned.

"Is that okay? You don't need to pay, I can spend for the two of us," she smiled weakly. "Jane, I have more than enough money for myself. Money that I have no idea what to spend it on or if I can even spend it at all. It's not a problem."

I agreed and accepted her offer.

Our room was beautiful. Even for a twin room. Everything was so clean and fresh and the place smelled wonderful. I looked out of the window and we were many stories high from the ground, it was amazing. My heart rate went faster and a smile was plastered on my face. I looked pasted all the tall buildings and watched the clouds. Then I looked down to the streets and the view was breath taking. Maura stood a few feet behind me and watched me bask at the astonishing surroundings. I heard her giggle and I turned around to see her smiling at me widely. Her eyes sparkled and her smile lit up the room. Her laugh filled my ears like symphony playing the most wonderful piece. I smiled back at her and she blushed. Maura Isles is beautiful.

She got up and went to her suitcase to pull out a nice white pullover and a pair of black leggings. I gave her a confused look and she asked why.

"Are you going to change?" I asked.

"Yes, aren't you?" Maura replied simply.

"No, my clothes are fine. And so are yours," I pointed out. "They're perfectly okay."

She pulled out a gray coat and laid out her clothes on her bed. Maura unbuttoned her blouse and my eyes went wide. She unzipped her shorts and I covered my eyes before I could see more of her body. I turned around and crossed my arms, feeling a lot awkward.

"Gee, you're comfortable," I said out loud.

"Are you not used to seeing a human body?" She asked.

I shook my head and waited for her to finish. When I turned back around my jaw dropped at how astounding she looked. Maura saw me staring and posed. I giggled and took a scarf from my bag along with a beanie. I she followed as I walked towards the door and held it open for her to come out first. I scoffed and she chuckled. We left the hotel and started with our little adventure.

"Are you ready for this?" I breathed. "I'm pretty dangerous."

"In a good way," she chuckled. "You're danger, Jane Rizzoli. I'm ready."

"Maura Isles, you are extraordinary," I smiled at her and hid her face to so I wouldn't see her smile peeking out.

She is extraordinary.

* * *

**_So yeah continue? Or not?_**


	2. Chapter 2

Dangerous

Chapter 2

**_HAPPY DANCING BECAUSE YOU GUYS LIKE IT. And yes, I did get the idea from that movie Before Sunrise ;) i need a little help, suggest some things. Oh, apologizing for any mistakes because I wrote this on my phone at 3 am here._**

* * *

For the first time in my life, I felt genuinely happy. I was smiling, I was laughing and I was having a good time. All my problems went away while I was with Maura Isles, in fact, it's like they never existed. Most people would just feel happy but what I felt was much more than that. I felt ecstatic. She made me feel warm and loved; I couldn't describe how amazing it felt with her. Maura is nothing but interesting. She was more. At that time of the day I would be sitting down on a plastic chair, that is far from comfortable, and watch my youngest brother Tommy play with his toy soldiers. I would silence my surroundings and only pay attention to the sound of my other brother's, Frankie's, monitor. I got used to all the patters that the machine would give me. Each day, it was different. One day it would be like a normal heartbeat and the next it would beat every two seconds. I learned never to get my hopes up at something that would just break me down later on. I was emotionless back in Boston. I taught myself to never be happy so nothing could make me sad. I was heartless so nothing could be broken. But what made me change? How could a girl, who I had just met during the morning, make me happy? What made me want her to come with me and follow my danger? There was something about Maura. "Have you ever had a hotdog?" I asked. We had been asking each other a bunch of question that begin with Have you ever so we would have an idea on what to do in our little trip.

"No," she replied. "They're filled with different parts of different animals, Jane. You never know what you're eating."

"I'm buying you a hotdog," I spotted a nearby hotdog cart straight ahead and pointed it out to her.

"You know, eating this would put you in the risk of cancer," we walked towards the cart as she gave me more information about the food. "It's not very healthy, Jane."

"Well, it's only one hotdog," I handed her the one that I bought. "How dangerous can it get?"

She smirked and took a bite out of it. Her eyes went wide and I bought her a drink.

"This is delicious," she mumbled, her mouth full. "Oh my God! It's so good!"

"Careful, you might get cancer," I joked. "Let me take a bite."

"No, it's mine!" Maura growled.

Adorable.

"Jesus, Maura," I chuckled. "You know, whenever I walked home from the hospital, a guy who has a stand would give me his one of specials, on the house."

"That's odd. You don't get a lot of money from selling hotdogs," she took another bite. "He needs the money, for sure."

"I know," I bit my lip. "I guess it's just an act of sympathy."

We both go silent for a while until she finished her hotdog. What amazed me is how clean she ate it. Not a single drop of mustard was fond on her shirt nor was it smeared anywhere around her mouth.

"I'm sick of it," I murmur. "The sympathy."

She just nodded her head and we never talked about it again. That's how I wanted it. I asked where out next destination would be and she perked up and gave me an answer that is similar to a child's. An amusement park. I have never gone to an amusement park when I was young. I've heard of it and how it's "filled with wonders" but I wouldn't know how to feel about it because I've never been to one.

* * *

I and Maura walked down the path of the amusement park while eating cotton candy. We had ridden almost all of the rides except two, the Merry-Go-Round and the Ferris wheel. Before we could get to our destination, something caught my attention. It was a game of strength. A man who wore a loose striped shirt was yelling a bunch of words so fast that you couldn't understand it; I stopped in my tracks and watched a man who had a very fit and buff body lift a mallet over his head and hit the silver cylinder in front of him. A red block went up metal bar with a bell on top to measure how strong her hit the cylinder. It stopped at what I think was the number ten which was a pretty high marking. I bet I could beat him. I thought. So I called Maura and pointed out the game, she raised her eyebrow and walked back to me. She smirked at me and I just shrugged and laughed at her. I told her what I was about to do and she shook her head at me while she giggled at my idea.

"People often get stronger when they have something that's bothering them," she said. "They can take it out on things very forcefully if the problem is big."

I walked towards the man who ran the game and slammed a dollar on his chest. Some guys gave me a few wolf whistles and laughed at my bravery. Assholes. I picked up the mallet and he re-set the game for me. The red block went back down to the bottom and the cylinder went back up to place. I heard a click and that told me that the game is ready. Maura cheered from the side and this made me laugh. I back away a bit and took a few breaths.

People often get stronger when they have something that's bothering them.

The people around me started counting down from five.

I remembered everything I've been going through. I remember Frankie passing out. _5_.

I remember my mother calling an ambulance. _4_.

I remember Tommy screaming and crying. _3_.

I remember the doctor announcing him being on a coma. _2_.

I remember my father walking out. _1_.

My shoulders tensed up, my fingers wrapped tightly around the handle, my heart beat raced and I couldn't feel anything. I heard the sound of a block hitting a bell and people cheered for me. Maura ran towards me and hugged my body. She felt my breaths and calmed me down. I relaxed in her arms and hugged her back.

"It's okay, Jane," she repeated in my ear.

* * *

After the previous events, Maura and I decided to stroll down Central Park and watch the sunset. We sat down under a tree in an area where there wasn't much people around to bother. This was the perfect opportunity to get to know each other a little bit more and know what we've been through over the past years of our lives. This was also the first time I've told someone everything I thought about.

"Think about it," I said. "We're probably never going to see each other again after the sun rises tomorrow."

"I suppose, you're right," she answered. "But isn't it a little risky to pour out your life story to a stranger you just met six hours ago?"

"It is risky, but I thought you already know what you're getting into when you agreed to come with me," I smirked. "I'm danger, remember?"

"In all the right ways," she breathed and rested her head on my shoulder. "I like the view here."

She had her eyes on the sky that was turning into a pink-orange color but my eyes were focused on something else. Someone else, to be more specific.

"Beautiful," I whispered.

Maura's eyes shifted to me and I smiled at her. She shook her head and laughed softly then she put her attention back to the sky.

"Charming," she said. "Very dangerous."

"Tell me about yourself," I murmured.

Maura thought about it for a moment. Her eyebrows were creased and she had an adorable pout on her face. Her hazel eyes reflected the color of the sky so well that it made them look like a masterpiece. Because they are.

"I'm Maura Dorthea Isles, I am nineteen years of age," she started off. "I am the adoptive child of Constance and Richard Isles."

"Continue," I said.

"I never got to see them that much growing up, I understand why. They were very busy people and they had their jobs to attend to. My parents would often be in places like France or Italy and I'll be at home studying or at ballet classes," she said.

"Ballet?" I giggled.

"Well, I did do some fencing and a little bit of tennis. Shall I continue?" I nodded. "I never asked for much, growing up. But they would give me more than what I needed. They still do. I guess they always thought that rewarding me would be enough to make up for their absence.

"Moving on, I take my education very seriously. I would always be the top of my class, up until now, actually. I've always wanted to be a doctor, but not just any doctor, I want to speak for the dead."

"Hold on, the dead?" I gasped.

"I'm very awkward at socializing, Jane. I either bore people or they'll get weirded out by everything I say. And my choice of words are offensive to others," she shrugged. "I can't lie. I get hives whenever I lie."

"Okay, I get it, continue."

"So, due to my awkward way of socializing, I want to work with the dead. I want to find out how they died and what caused them to die. I want to be able to say what they no longer have the chance to tell," she said. "It's different with the non living, Jane. They're incapable of judging you."

"I'm not judging you," I pouted.

"You're different," she replied. "Why you're still here is a mystery to me."

I giggled at her comment.

"Whenever anybody tried to have any sort of relationship with me, I would just freak them out or not be able to entertain them. I would diagnose them whenever I see any symptoms of a certain disability or illness and it would push them away then ruin their lives. If it got far, I would talk to them about how I grew up and give them tiny facts about things then manage to bore them. It came to the point that I just stopped trying. Whenever somebody approached me, I would politely deny them. My only friend is Bass."

"Who's Bass?" I asked and she pulled out her phone to show me a picture of a picture giant turtle that was big enough to be a dog.

"He's my African spurred Tortoise," she said. "He's very lovely and great company."

"Cute," I said. Not in a bad way, I said it truly. I really found her cute. "How come you didn't push me away like those other people?"

"You found me interesting," she blushed. "That's the first time."

We both looked each other in the eyes and we're stuck in that moment for what seemed like thousands of years. A smile creeped onto my face and also hers. We stayed like that for a while until she broke the silence.

"Although, a part of me wants to be an actress," she added. "But my parents frowned upon it."

"That's kind of funny, you know?"

"Why? Because they haven't been their for the most of my life and they still manage to hold me down into doing what I want to do?"

She just took the words out of my mouth.

"Our lives are pretty twisted," I said. "I guess it's my turn."

"It is."

"Well, my name is Jane Clementine Rizzoli-" I paused to see her grinning. "Don't laugh!"

"I'm not laughing, I'm smiling," she defended. "It's cute. Please, continue."

"I'm twenty years old. I grew up with my mom and dad, Angela and Frank Rizzoli. I have two brothers, Frankie who is four years younger than me and Tommy who is just eight years old." I continued. "I didn't really grow up with anything fancy, I enjoyed what I had and what is given to me. My family isn't rich but we have enough to last. I played baseball, hockey and tennis, too. Oh! And I box! I am very athletic."

"I can see that," she poked my stomach.

"Ow!" I winced and laughed. "Two years ago, Frankie got into a cardiac arrest and we had to rush him to the hospital. It was all a mess. My mother was crying and Tommy was screaming, my dad was doing some work a few houses away.

"When we were at the hospital, the doctor told us everything that had happened and that we are very lucky that Frankie was still alive. But it didn't feel like it. He announced that he has fell into a coma and it would take days, months or even years for him to wake up. My father head about this and he lost it. He got mad at us, he started shouting and he snapped. He just left. He never answered our calls, he never came back and we never saw him again. Sooner than I knew it, days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months and months turned into years. I was already giving up. That's when I kind of changed."

"How so?"

"Well, I started to get very irritable at my family. Ma would get mad because I would be happy and relaxed one moment and then out of nowhere, I'm in rage. I didn't understand. I got mad at all the little things and every time I got hurt, I wanted to just end it. I wanted to end my life. The Jane Rizzoli they used to know just fell apart. I started hurting myself, I would cut my wrists, punch the walls and even try to commit. Every night I would get into silly fights with my mother and then I would go home and find myself in the verge of finishing my life. I was always in that moment between life and death. I knew I wanted to die but at the same time, I wanted to live my life. Because whenever I was happy, I would be in euphoria, you know? But whenever I'm mad and take it out on someone, I would be filled with rage and then feel the agonizing guilt after. I would become depressed by what I did and I would end up in that same thought of killing myself.

"I decided that the only way to stop it is to stop feeling anything. I pushed everyone away and started to care less. I can't fall down if I never went up, anyway," I sighed. "Every morning, I go to the gym and take out all the hidden feelings into a punching bag. That's how I got into boxing. All that wall punching had to be put to a use, right?"

Maura stayed silent and the sun was already starting to set.

"Jane," she mumbled. "Has it ever crossed your mind that you may have a personality disorder?"

"N-no," I stuttered. "What are you getting at?"

"You've been showing symptoms of BPD," she said. "Borderline Personality Disorder."

"What's that?" I asked with all seriousness.

"Well, it makes a person very transitional when it comes to emotions," she informed. "Mood swings."

"Yes," I nodded for her to go on.

"BPD makes a person feel emotions much more pure and deeper than a normal person would feel," she said. "For instance, average people would feel happy and you would feel ecstatic. Same with sadness, the regular person would feel sadness and you would feel agony and depression. This happens with all emotions.

"When you get frustrated, you do have the tendency to bring out the worst of yourself towards people. Then later on, you'll feel an extreme amount of guilt that leads to depression and the thoughts of viewing yourself as a horrible person who does all these bad things. When you bring yourself down, the thoughts of suicide kick in. I don't want to go further on that topic," she finished. "But something very beautiful about this is how much you care for other people more than yourself. You can not be selfish. You are a person who is willing to risk your own life just for another person's happiness."

"But why did this happen? How did I get it?"

"It can happen a lot of ways. You could be an abused child, people judge you or you've been left. Well, in your case, when you've lost a lot of people or someone who is very important to you, this may occur. You lost two very important people in the period of one night, Jane. People with BPD are very sensitive when it comes to losing people. In fact, a change in someone can lead them to frustration and depression. When someone changes, it's the same thing to losing someone. When people change, you're facing a new person. Not the person you've been with. But back to your case. The reason why you feel the guilt is because you don't want to lose the person. You'll do everything not to push them away but suddenly you forget how to love and become a monster instead. When you realize what you've done, you'll feel so bad and turn to punishing yourself. You'd rather lose yourself than lose any more people, Jane."

"Wow," I breathed. "You just described everything I've been feeling for the past two years. Maybe this who borderline thing is right. I know it's not sure but it's better to live on some possibility than confusion,"

"You're more dangerous than I thought," she joked. "People with this disorder tend to act impulsively when they're deep into an emotion."

"Elaborate."

"Sadness equals to harm in self, anger equals to harm in others, love equals to intimacy and happiness-" she paused. "I'm not sure about happiness."

"Let's see for our selves," I grinned mischievously. "You've been a responsible little girl during your who teenage life and I've been too depressed to function."

"Where is this heading?"

"How about we live out all that we missed tonight?" I suggested. "Let's be wild, irresponsible and foolish teenagers."

"Jane, what are you proposing?" Maura asked. "What do you plan?"

"I am saying that we should do every stupid thing we couldn't do tonight," I said with cheer. "What do you say, Maura Isles?"

"You're danger," she replied. "I love danger."

"Danger in all the right ways, my dear," I giggled. "The night is young and we still are, too!"

The sun set out of view and the sky turned darker by the second. She grabbed my hand and we ran off into the city to live out whatever we had missed all our lives. I have never been so happy.

* * *

Maura insisted that we go back to the hotel and changed but I told her that it would be time consuming. She still was eager to get a change of outfit because she said that it wasn't the appropriate attire for clubs or anything. I gave in and went shopping with her for half an hour and we hit the clubs.

"Have you ever drank?" I asked.

"Water, two liters a day," she replied.

"No, silly," I laughed. "Alcohol! And wine doesn't count!"

"Oh, then, no. I have not drank any alcoholic beverage," she replied. "Do you plan to get drunk?"

"I guess it's not really a wise thing to do," I said. "Let's have a couple of drinks and see where it goes."

We saw a line outside of this very nice club that we heard everybody nearby talk about. I sighed and saw that the bouncer was tall, muscular and very intimidating. Maura saw this as well and we both lined up at the back of the long line. I groaned and watched all the posh and rich people come in and out of the club with ease. The bouncer would let anybody who had cash inside without hesitation. Maura saw this and I stopped her from pulling out any money from her purse.

"No, Maura," I warned. "Anybody can steal that the moment you pull it out."

"But they're doing it," she pointed at a couple who handed a thick roll of cash to the bouncer. "What's the matter?"

"They can do it because the bouncer is a very scary man, Maura. Nobody can take from him," I whispered. "Also, he'll check for our ID's. We are not over twenty one, Maur."

"You called me Maur," she blushed. "Nobody has ever called me that."

"Well, I'm different," I smiled.

Right then, a younger man replaced the bouncer and he looked just a few years younger than I am. I grabbed Maura's arm and told her to follow my lead.

"What are we doing?" She asked.

"Something very crazy," I laughed. "You up for it?"

"Yeah," she nodded eagerly.

"Okay, follow my lead," I said.

We stood in front of the bouncer boy and he asked for some ID. I looked at Maura and she nodded. This was very crazy.

"ID?" I asked. "Hold on, let me just-"

I grabbed the hem of my shirt and pulled it up above my chest. I flashed the boy and his eyes widened, so did the people next to him.

"Is it good?" I asked.

"You're great-it's great!" He flushed and I walked past the velvet rope her just opened.

Maura's jaw dropped and I winked at her. She laughed and shook her head. Before she could get in, the bouncer stopped her and it wasn't for ID. Anyone who had eyes could see that Maura had a very impressive pair on her chest and nobody is stupid enough to pass off the opportunity.

She grabbed the hem of her top and flashed the boy in front of her.

We both get in the club and are met by colorful flashing lights all around us and the sound of loud thumping club music. Maura was laughing and wrapped her arm around my waist while my arm was placed around her shoulder. Around us were multicolored drinks and the sounds of laughter. Maura's gripped tightened around my waist and I looked at her. I saw her taking in her surroundings and a grin appeared on her face. She pulled me closer and I felt a rush of excitement flow around my body. I knew to myself that Maura felt it too. We looked at each-other with eyes that were shades darker and we knew what trouble we could get into if somebody knew about it. But thing was, nobody was there to tell us not to do it. Nobody could hold us back. It was just me, her and the night. Nobody could stop us.

* * *

Our bodies were closer than ever and we were already grinding to the music the DJ had playing. I could feel my chest colliding with Maura's back and her ass making contact with my junk. Heat filled my body due to the amount of arousal I felt towards her. We were both aware of what we were doing and what it would result to but we didn't make a move to stop it.

We were dancing with drinks in hand while the eye of many men would meet us. I couple of guy would come up to us and offer to buy us a drink but we weren't stupid enough to fall for a date-rape drug.

Whenever someone would walk up to one of us, we used the same excuse to get them away. And we were having a lot of fun with it.

"Can I offer you a drink?" A tall and handsome brunette walked up to Maura while we were dancing.

"No, I'm sorry," she replied. "Thank you, though."

"Come on! Just one drink," he said and tried to hand her a glass of martini. "It can't hurt a beautiful lady such as you."

"Excuse me," I spoke up. "What are you doing?"

"I'm just trying to get a pretty girl a nice drink and maybe her number," he winked.

"This pretty girl?" I pointed to Maura as I wrapped my arm around her waist. He nodded. "She happens to be my fiancée. Right, babe?"

"Mmhmm!" She nodded and kissed my cheek.

The mad walked away and tried it on with another girl. We both laughed and continued drinking and dancing.

I couldn't help but feel tiny fireworks in my veins whenever we touch. It's a new feeling to me. It was one of those little wonders that she brought to me.

My hands slithered onto her stomach and I managed to make her face me. Our eyes met and I was trapped in her spell that enchanted me while it lasted. I pulled her in closer and out faces were inches apart. She closed her eyes and our foreheads meet then slowly by slowly our lips pulled in together until there was a tiny gap between them. We weren't drunk so we both had known what was happening. But we didn't stop. We were in that beautiful and amazing moment when you're at the very peak of kissing someone you've been craving for a while. It wasn't until we got stopped by the sound of people cheering and pumping their fists to the beat of the music.

The DJ had announced that it was time to do Body Shots. Whoever the spotlight landed on had to pick a person to do it to and everyone in the room went wild.

The bright white light circled the club and stopped randomly at a person. I looked for the light and saw that it was on Maura.

My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. She held my hand and everyone was cheering louder. The DJ screamed into the mic that it was time for her to choose a partner and she pointed at me with the widest of smiled. This made me laugh and people cleared the way so we could make it to the bar that was especially cleaned for her.

"Do you know how to do this?" I asked.

"I saw it in a documentary about teenage behavior once," she said.

"Fair enough," I shrugged.

I hopped on the bar and lifted up my tank top. The bartender grabbed a mic and explained the ruled to the crowd so we would know what was about and should happen. Maura listened attentively.

He pulled out a shot glass and the bottle of tequila and spoke into the mic.

"Listen up! We do body shots a little differently around here," he said. Everybody screamed louder. "We place this shot here on the naval and the essentials around it. You, mam, are not allowed to spill the shot or else we'll have to be repeating this again"

He placed the shot glass onto my belly button and poured the tequila in it. It overflowed and spilled some on my stomach, but I was sure that was meant to happen. He put shook some salt on my v-line and squeezed a slice of lime just below my chest on the rib-area. The bartender gave me the lime and winked. I looked at Maura to see if she's okay and I found her checking out my exposed stomach. Her eyes were almost brown and she licked her lips at the sight. I smirked and was ready for this.

"Are you ready?" He asked Maura and she nodded. "Let's go!"

The crowd cheered for Maura as she placed her soft, pink tongue at the place furthest my v-line was exposed and licked off all the salt that was on it. Not a single granule was left, for sure. I found it hard not to move or moan at her actions.

She licked all the way up to my stomach to retrieve the shot glass on my naval and she wrapped her lips around the rim. She lifted her head and finished the thing in a gulp. Her face squirmed at the taste and I found it very cute. Maura got back to work and licked the spilled liquids on my stomach, all the way up to the lime juice. She licked my exposed torso clean and I immediately got up to place the lime on her mouth.

For a girl who had never drank in her entire life, she had impressive alcohol tolerance. It was very arousing.

The game ended and we decided to head out because it was midnight already and we were tired.

"Jane Rizzoli, you are so fucking sexy," she growled and pushed me back into the cab.

"I thought you don't curse," I smirked.

"This is my first time," she said huskily. "You are very dangerous."

"In what way?" I asked.

"All the right ways, baby," she whispered into my ear. "I wanna get you back to that hotel and have a good look at your abs."

* * *

**_OKAY! I'm not writing any sex right now but you know where that's headed. Reviews & suggestions are very much appreciated :( and people do fall in a day dont judge my choices (and i didn't want to go overboard with the body shots thing so i made it more um innocent_**


	3. Chapter 3

_**Some anon asked my on tumblr why I know so much about borderline and I'll answer that here. It's simply because I have it ;) okay here we goooo (and i suck at writing about sex so someone help me)**_

* * *

November 28th, 2013 — 4:11 AM

I woke up at around four in the morning lying down on the floor feeling a cold breeze hit me. I tried to get up but I felt some weight being put on my chest and I looked down to see a passed out Maura sleeping on my chest. The sight made me smile until I felt somewhat exposed. It took me a while of confusion and wondering to find out that I wasn't wearing clothes. So was Maura,  
Memories flash through my mind of the night before. And I remember being pushed back on the door and having my clothes ripped out. I remember Maura's lips on mine and our bodies touching. I remember my hands roaming around Maura's smooth white body. I remember her screaming my name. I remember everything.

_ "Wait- Maur- what is this?" I asked after being pushed onto the bed. "What does it mean?"_  
_She laid down beside me and wrapped her arms around my body. I could feel her chest heaving up and down in a rhythmic pattern._  
_ "I really like you, Jane. I'm also not drunk," she said. "I know it's only been a day, but there's something about you."_  
_ "Mutual, Maura," I said._  
_ "When we part ways this morning, I don't want to be left with regret. I want you to know this and I want to make love to you because we don't know if we'll ever see each-other again," she whispered. Her words filled with emotion. "Let's make our time last, Jane Rizzoli."_  
_ "Let's do this," I said._

* * *

_"Jane, I don't want to sleep in separate beds," she pouted. "But we can't fit in one."_  
_"Let's sleep on the floor, then," I kissed her cheek. "Come on."_  
_I grabbed my pillow and threw it on the floor, she grabbed the duvet and wrapped it around us. Our legs were intwined and our arms were wrapped around each other's bodies. We didn't have much time left to be together but we had us. Only us. That's all we needed._  
_We're able to bring the happiness we've been longing for years into one day. That's truly amazing._  
_I have always feared being left alone but now my biggest fear is having to lose her. She showed me what happiness is and she showed me how to love life. Our time is limited so we have to make the most out of it. And I'm afraid that my time with her has come to an end._

* * *

I woke her up and got up. The tears in my eyes started to form as I brushed my teeth and got dressed. I could see a tear falling down her face and this made my heart drop.  
The deal was over, it was time to leave my only source of happiness and in that moment I was breaking.  
I remember seeing her frown at the plane after talking to her mother.  
I remember hearing her say my name for the first time in the plane and how right it sounded coming from her.  
I remember seeing her smile as we rode the carousel in the amusement part and watching her be fascinated at the view in the ferris wheel.  
I remember having her head on my shoulder as we talked about life and how it's been hard for us.  
I remember spending the night being careless and free with her by my side.  
My shoulders tense up and I punch the mirror in front of me. I giant crack is formed and my left hand felt numb. I saw blood drip on the floor and loud bangs came from the door. I could hear Maura screaming my name and asking me to open for her.  
I walk towards the door and unlock it. She opens it wide and I stand in front of her feeling no emotion. I look at her blankly and she sees the blood on the tiles. She grabbed my fist and saw the tiny pieces of broken class surrounding it and cutting my skin. She grabbed a towel and gently wrapped it around my hand. Even if she was panicking, she managed to do things with finesse.  
She led me to her suitcase and she pulled out a first aid kit. She was saying words but I couldn't hear them. All I heard was a long beep and that was it. I could see her mouth moving but nothing registers. I slowly regained the strength to hear but I couldn't understand.  
I couldn't understand everything.  
She was picking out all the little pieces of glass on my skin with a pair of tweezers and disinfected it afterwards. She put some cotton and gauze on the bleeding parts of my hand then wrapped a bandage around it.  
She was still talking. I found difficulty making out the words but all I understood was my name. She said something like "minor injury" but that's it.  
"Maura, let go!" I practically shouted.  
She let go and I grabbed my bag with my other hand.  
"I'm sorry, it's time for me to go," I said.  
"Jane, don't!"  
And that was it.  
I closed the door, made my way to the elevator then left the building.  
I stood on the street and raised my hand to call a taxi. They all drove past me and I groaned.  
I just left everything that made me happy. There I was, back to being miserable. I didn't know what to do.  
Maura made me happy and I left her.  
The more she made me happy, the more I couldn't face to lose her. It was better to leave before I get too attached.  
I broke all my rules for her. She made me forget about everything bad in life and made me see all the good things. As I stood their on the side walk with my bag flung on my shoulder, I saw everything I couldn't see with Maura. I saw everything bad.  
A pair of arms wrap around my waist and I knew who they belonged to.  
I didn't want to turn around.  
"I know this is hard for you, Jane," she sobbed. "I just want you to know that I will never forget you. I can never forget you. You're danger, Jane. You're my danger. You made me fall for your charm and I don't know if I'll ever get up. It's a pleasure to have spent that time with you, Jane. I hope you won't forget me."  
I couldn't. I turned around to face her.  
She was only wearing a robe with her night gown underneath. This girl is crazy, that's enough to make her interesting.  
"If you stay, I won't leave. I can never leave. You'll be stuck with me," she whispered. "But if you leave, I just hope you'll still remember me. You could tell our story to your kids one day. Don't forget me, Jane Rizzoli."  
"It would be risky to be without you," I managed to reply. "It's dangerous out there."  
I grabbed her hand and she pulled me in for a tight hug. She cried on my shoulder and I tried so hard not to cry for the both of us.  
"I'm never going to leave you," she said. "I'm not interesting enough."  
"You're wearing a robe and crying in the middle of a sidewalk," I joked and kissed her head. "That's pretty interesting."

* * *

The two of us sat down on one of the beds as we faced each other. Maura had ordered us room service so we could have some breakfast while we prepared to talk about what would happen to the both of us next.  
Our morning never really went as well as we would have wanted it to and we had stayed quiet about the earlier events that had led us to where we were then.  
Silence filled the room and only the sounds of the forks and knives hitting the plate could be heard. It was awkward for us. It was very awkward to sit in front of someone, who you went through so much trouble because you were so destined to leave, and try to have a normal conversation with them as though nothing happened. But she made it easier for me. She gave us something to talk about. Maura talked about how if she pursued a career in acting, she wanted her projects to be inspirational and memorable. She told me about how when she was younger, she would stand in front of the mirror and reenact a famous scene from a certain movie. Maura had told me about how she wanted to make a movie that involved ballet.  
"I wanted it to be sort of like Tarzan," she said. "I had crazy ideas as a child."  
"Do tell," I smirked. "What were young Maura Isles' plans in life?"  
"Well, I wanted it to be about a man and a woman who find each other in a jungle or a forest," she started. "My story was about a woman who studies birds and a man who had been living in a jungle his whole life. But he wasn't raised my apes."  
We laughed and I told her to continue.  
"The man was the son of two explorers and his parents passed away when he was just a boy. He grew up and taught himself how to survive with the resources around him and tame every animal that he would meet," I nodded. "And then this girl comes along to find an extremely rare bird species. I haven't decided which one, they are all so marvelous. The man finds her trying to attract the certain bird and followed her around while she looked for it. Until one day, she finally finds one then she chased it around the jungle and managed to lose it. It turns out, the man did a call to attract the bird to him. And while the woman was frustrated and had given up, he decided to come out of the blue with the bird on his shoulder. They spend some time together and the woman tells him all about how it is in civilization while the man would tell her about how it was in the jungle. She would even teach him some ballet and they would end up dancing in the middle of a beautiful place surrounded by flowers and a waterfall."  
"Wow," I breathed. "Maura, thats-"  
"Stupid?" She cut in. "I know."  
"No, that's beautiful," I said. "That's a great story, Maur."  
"Thank you," she blushed. "I'm fond with the idea of two completely different people become fascinated with their worlds and manage to be fascinated by each other."  
We looked at each other in the eyes and I was once again lost in pools of hazel that sparkled in the light.  
"Mutual," I whispered.  
A pause.  
"What did you want to be when you grew up?"  
I thought about it for a moment and had difficulty finding answer.  
"I want to be a detective," I answered. "I wanted to solve crimes and shoot people. But I have the idea to be a boxer."

"You've finished college, right?" She asked.  
"Yeah, I graduated high school early because I was really smart and I got a scholarship in BCU. I didn't really finish college but I had to stop because-" I paused and looked down.  
"It's okay, you don't need to tell me," she said as she placed her hand on my shoulder.  
"Do you want to go skating?"  
After that scene, we went to the nearest ice rink that we could find. Skating was another way for me to release frustration. When I was younger, I used to play hockey down at our local rink. My mother never loved the idea of me rough housing with a bunch of boys that were a couple years older than me in a game of hockey but that's what I loved to do. It made me happy. The plan she had in mind was to make a figure skater but then I saw one of the little girls' brother's drop her off one day and he had a long stick on his hand with his helmet on the other. I got curious as to what it was for so instead of going to practice, I followed some guys who had the same things to a hockey rink. I watched them play a game and I begged my dad to sign me up for it.  
"Quit being a showoff with your skating moves, Rizzoli," Maura joked. "I can do those, too.  
"Really, now?" I smirked. "Show me what you've got, Dorthea."  
She started to skate backwards around me and whipped herself across the ice. She spun around so gracefully and so delicately then she slowed down to skate towards me.  
Maura grabbed my arm and pulled me with her. We skated around the rink and I came to a stop in the center.

"You're good," I said. "I can do better if it weren't for my hand."

* * *

We sat down on the same spot we stopped at the day before when we watched the sunset. Only this time, we were here to watch the stars. We talked about life a bit more and how we would want it to be like. Our opinions were all so different but they connected in a way that made them equal. We had serious conversations and we had light ones. Whatever we talked about, it would go on forever until a new topic came along. Like how we went from talking about the educational system to what would be easier to consume between a taco and a burrito. It's conversations like these that make it easier to see how compatible you are with a person.  
Maura and I had stayed in that spot for more than four hours. We shared laughs and we shared cries throughout that time. She made me feel very connected in the stories and topics that she would tell; that made me happy. We talked as though nothing in the world could bother us. And nothing did.  
"Okay, it's really not in human nature to have superpowers," she said.  
"I know but what if we develop them in a time of our life when our bodies are ready?" I asked.  
"I'm sure we'd all have known by now," she replied. "That's impossible, Jane."  
"What if people aren't allowed to talk about it or else we'll lose the powers?" I defended.  
"Maybe our powers are based on strengths. Like, I'm strong, maybe I have super strength and they're in the developing stage."  
"Jane, our bodies are not designed to stand any supreme modifications in them."  
"They might be. Ours aren't just ready yet, that's why the powers haven't kicked in."

She shook her head at me while she giggled at my ideas.

We stayed in silence for what seemed like hours. The moon illuminated the sky and I could see her eyes twinkle in the moonlight. Her eyes were able to see everything I couldn't see and couldn't be happy about. She helped me.

"Jane, about last night," she broke the silence. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" I asked.

"I'm sorry that our first kiss wasn't as magical as it should be," she closed her eyes. "I didn't think you'd still be here."

I didn't say anything back. I didn't know how to. I felt her shift her body so she would be facing me and wrapped her arms around my waist. She nuzzled her face in my neck and apologized repeatedly. She was right. I could have been better. If we only knew that we would still be together then it could have been more special. But it doesn't mean that it can't.

"Then, let's start over," I said.

I stood up and took her hand. I pulled her up so we would be both standing up under the stars. I rested my forehead on hers and I smiled. Our noses touch and she giggled. My arm slithered around her waist and I pulled her in closer. She wrapped her arms around my neck and closed her eyes. I felt her breath on my lips and I hovered my lips over hers. It was only us, the stars and everything else. I could smell her Chanel perfume and cherry lip gloss. Our breathing was slow and calm when in reality we were the exact opposite. She tilted her head and I did as well.

"Jane," she whispered. Her voice was deep and raspy. "Kiss me."

I closed the gap and I did.

Our lips crashed on each other and I felt her soft pink lips on mine.

My lips felt like tiny fireworks were set off on them and all the sparks flew across my body.

I pulled her in closer and our bodies were pressed together. She stifled a quiet moan and my tongue swiftly moved across her lips. Maura allowed my entrance and our tongues danced along in sync. Her hands were in my hair and my arms kept us close together.

The kiss ended naturally but we don't remove our arms from each other. We swayed in quietness with smiled on our faces. I opened my eyes to meet hers and we giggled.

"That could be our first kiss," I whispered. "How does that sound?"

"It sounds perfect," she smiled and captured my lips once again. "You're charming, Jane."

"Hmm."

"So charming that it's hazardous," she giggled. "I should watch out."

"Yeah, I might have to kiss you if you don't be careful," I smiled and pecked her lips. "You're amazing, Maura Dorthea Isles."

"You're dangerous," she said. "In all the right ways."

* * *

**_So um this chapter is kinda like lazy writing, sorry. I hope that you still like it :( tell me what you want to happen and i'll do my best_**


	4. Chapter 4

**_Hi! I'll be doing a time jump in this and the next chapters so this chapter is just a short one. I've got a plan._**

**_Oh, and it's been a while since I've written, sorry. I've been reading more than writing. And by the way, I'm not strictly following the movie. I want to be somewhat original, the movie just serves as something like the base of the story. Suggestions and reviews are very much appreciated and smiled upon. This chapter sucks by the way. I just thought that this story needed to be updated fast! I'm not abandoning it._**

**_Thanks for sticking around! Here we go! :D_**

* * *

"I'm going to miss you," I said as she folded her clothes neatly. "Will you keep in touch?"

It was the end of our wonderful time together in New York and we were going back to our past lives. This made me very depressed and frustrated. I knew this wouldn't last as long as I wanted to but the limitation never bothered me while the time was running out. I wouldn't be able to hold her soft and gentle hands, hear her beautiful laugh, gaze at her enchanting smile, and kiss her precious lips. These thoughts scattered in my head and made it harder to hold back the burning tears in my eyes.

I rolled around and stuffed my face in a pillow so she wouldn't see the tears falling down my face. I tried hard not to let out a sob and control my breathing but it wasn't enough for her not to notice the sadness I've been feeling.

"Jane," she walked towards my bed and sat down beside me. "We'll still be together in the plane."

"For thirty minutes, Maura," I sobbed. "That's too fast."

Time was very fast. One moment, I was just getting to know her and the next, she's leaving.

"Look at me," she said and I rolled over to meet her eyes. She leaned over so we would be face to face and she held my face in her hand as the other balanced herself on top of me. "This isn't the last time we'll be together."

Maura leaned in and gave me a soft and passionate kiss. A tear fell down from my eye and she pulled back then wiped it away.

I didn't want her to pull back.

I held her face between my hands and gave her the most powerful kiss I've ever given to her. Tears were streaming down both of our faces and she grabbed a fistful of my hair.

I sat up and rested our foreheads together without pulling away. I held the back of her neck and she slithered her arm around my waist so it laid on the small of my back. I pulled away and cried.

"Do you promise, Maura Isles?" I whispered.

"I promise, Jane Rizzoli."

I hid my face on her shoulder as she stroked my back to calm me down.

"I can always drop by whenever I'm not busy," she said. "Cambridge isn't far from where-"

Maura paused. She didn't want to remind me where I'll be. She didn't want to remind me of how I'll be back in that hospital room listening to the slow beeps of a heart rate monitor.

"We can ever spend Christmas together," she insisted. "I can invite your family over."

"You don't have to-"

"Jane, I'd love to," she cut me off.

"Maura, no," I said. "There's nobody who'll watch my brother."

"Oh," she looked down and bit her lip. "We still have a few more hours until we need to get to the airport. Do you want to go anywhere?"

"No, I want to stay here and talk about life," I said. "With you."

* * *

The plane ride was silent, not a single sound from the both of us. The only words exchanged were the ones from our eyes and our hands.

_"Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you," I lied._

_ She closed her book and shifted her position to face me then she held out her hand and smiled warmly, "I'm Jane, by the way. Jane Rizzoli."_

_ "That's okay, I'm Maura Isles," she introduced herself and we shook hands. "I didn't notice I had company, I'm sorry."_

_ "Oh, don't worry. It's only been, like, twenty minutes," I joked and she blushed a little. "So, heading off to New York?"_

_ "Yes, I just wanted to take some time off from University," she held up her book and put it back down on her lap. "How about you?"_

_ "Well, my mother won a trip to New York," I leaned back on my seat. "So, that's where I'm going."_

_ Maura bit her lip and fumbled with her thumbs. She's very nice, by the means of how we met. I hoped that it wasn't the only time I'll get to see her._

_ "You seem very," I bit my lip and thought of the word best suiting. "Interesting."_

And she is.

"You have my number, right?" She asked. "Will you call me?"

"Every night," I smiled weakly. "You'll text me, right?"

"Every day," she whispered. "Can I drop by after my classes?"

"Yeah," I said. "You can tell me about dehydration and seizures. Then we can chill and talk about the universe."

"I never figured you as the deep type," she said and I kissed her hand. "I guess there's more to find out about the dangerous Jane Rizzoli."

I smiled at the word. Dangerous, like to cause harm and pain. Did I cause her any harm? How about pain? I can't say I have. All I want is the best for her. I could never harm her or see her get hurt. She's too marvelous for that. She's too precious. I need to protect her and I can. I just need to find a way.

We got off the plane and I could have sworn I could feel the ground sucking me in.

Her driver held a sign with her last name on it and took her luggage. Maura asked for some privacy and the driver obliged. She turned to look at me and held my head beneath her hands. A tear fell down my face and she wiped it away. She's being strong.

I let out a sob and she took me in her arms. I cried her name over and over again and she tried to calm me down. It was no use. My heart was shattered to pieces.

My sleeps wouldn't be warm and the atmosphere would be cold. I wouldn't be able to close my eyes with her being the last vision. I wouldn't be able to feel her arms wrapped tightly around me and her head on my chest. I wouldn't be able to smell her perfume and shampoo. I wouldn't be able to have her with me as I sleep. It wouldn't be the same.

Sure, she'd come over and sure we'll spend time. But the time would only be as limited as the time we've already spent. The more she left, the more I would feel empty. I wanted her with me. I needed her with me.

"Jane," she whispered.

"I don't know if I can make it without you, Maura. I don't know if I can be happy," I sobbed. "I'll be dead."

"I'll always visit when I can, Jane," she said. "I promise."

"But it won't be the same," I grabbed her shirt. "You'll always leave in the end."

"Jane, listen," Maura pulled away a little and I already missed her warmth. "Did you care about time, while we were together? Did it ever cross your mind?"

I shook my head.

"Time will only be a problem if you make it. You won't have any worries if you don't think about it," she whispered. "What's not present won't be able to hurt you, Jane."

She wiped my tears away and gave me a long and powerful kiss. I pulled her closer and she wrapped her arms around my neck. We were pressed together and it didn't matter if people would see us. In our perspective, it was just us and nothing else in the world. That's how it should be.

We pulled away and laid our foreheads together. Our eyes were still closed and we panted as we caught our breaths. She gave me a soft, short kiss and we opened our eyes.

"I don't want to let go," I whispered.

"Me too. I seemed to have fallen for your charm," she said. "You're danger, Jane Rizzoli."

"In what way?" I asked.

"In all the right ways."


	5. Chapter 5

**_Deleted the rant. Special thanks to_** **_xbgamer94_****_ for helping me out on some things and also to every single one of you that supported the story! (Thanks to "Guest" too!)_**

* * *

December 17th, 2013

It had been a week since I last saw Maura and we had made contact through texting and calling whenever she was free. She was a very busy girl and there I was, sat in my chair of shattered dreams, back to watching walls and monitors. My little brother, Tommy, was sat on the feet of Frankie's hospital bed and was playing with his old toy cars. He seemed so happy and joyful even if he was just in front of his unconscious older brother and all he had for entertainment were his old hand-me-down toys. I wondered why I can't be that happy. I was happy with Maura. Why can't I be happy now?

"Janie, can you help me with my homework?" He asked quietly and cautiously. He was scared. He was scared of me. I just nodded and helped him off the ned to get his back pack.

"Since when did you do homework?" I smirked slightly. He seemed surprised. "Let me see."

Tommy sat back up on the bed and bit on the nail of his thumb. He handed me his notebook and I flipped through the pages. He pointed at the page he had written down the task and I read it.

What is life and why is it important? Write your answer in five sentences.

That's simple. Life is Maura and her importance can not fit in only five sentences.

If only I could answer with that. If Maura were there, she would know the answer. She knew everything. Maura wouldn't just answer that question, she would explain how fourteen million years ago, there was nothing but darkness then later on there was a big bang. Maura would tell us how stars were the first source of life and that stars die. She would go on about how a meteor struck earth and ended the life of all dinosaurs. She would tell us about how everything ends and it's nothing we can escape because when something dies, another thing is born.

Maybe I should die? It would do something some good.

Before I could answer the question, my phone rang. I told Tommy to hold on and I went outside the room. Maura's name flashed on my screen and I tapped on the answer button with a silly smile on my face.

"Hey, Maur," I bit my lip. "What are you up to?"

"Hello, Jane," she said with her soft and warm voice. It relaxed me and made my heart beat faster. "I'm actually free. I've got no more work to do."

"Hmm, how was your day?" I asked. "Did you have a good one?"

"It was normal. I do feel a little bored, though," she said. "How about you?"

"My day was- well- you know," I sighed. "I'm just about to help my little brother with his homework."

"Really? What class?"

"Science, I think," I answered and smiled a bit. "You're good at these things, maybe you could help."

"I can," she said. "Do you mind me coming over?"

"I don't mind, that would be great," I bit my lip harder and felt butterflies in my stomach. "I'll text you the room number."

"Okay, Jane," she said. "Good bye."

"Bye."

I went back in the room with a giant smile on my face with my phone clutched to my chest. Tommy seemed a bit confused and I told him that his homework could wait for a little bit.

"I got someone great to do your homework," I said.

"Did you get a scientist?" He asked.

"Nope, someone better," I messed his hair up and started texting Maura some details.

* * *

My head shot up when a knock on the door could be heard around the room. I quickly got up from my seat and fixed wrinkled clothes. I ran my fingers through my hair and told Tommy to wait in the room. My hands shook as I slowly opened the door and saw a cute little Maura standing behind it.

She had her hand in her pocket and the other clutched on her shoulder bag. Her hair was up so I could see her dimples and her beautiful face so fully and clearly. I shut the door behind me and leaned back on it.

We were both silent and smiled like idiots in the middle of the hall. I opened my mouth but no words came out so I just bit on the inside of my cheeks. She looked around if anyone was in sight and she looked back at me. I chuckled, she looked at my hands and held them. She carefully pulled up my sleeves and looked back up to me.

"Self harm isn't healthy, Jane," she said. "Does anyone know?"

"No," I murmured. "I'll stop, if you want."

"Promise it," she looked me in the eye and I squeezed her hand. "Promise me that you will never hurt yourself, ever again."

"I promise," I whispered and gave her a kiss.

Maura frowned for a moment but later on smiled. She didn't want to see the scars but she was happy there weren't any new ones.

She lifted her palm to my cheek and I laid my hand on it. I heard her mumble my name and she stood on the tips of her toes then leaned in. I closed my eyes and felt her soft, vanilla-flavored lips on mine. The scent of her lavender shampoo intoxicated me and more did her kiss.

She slowly got back down, flat on her feet and relaxed my arms when it was time for us to pull away. I lightly stroked her cheek with my thumb and smiled. Maura gave me a quick peck on the lips and giggled.

"I missed you," she said. "I missed you, so much."

"I missed you, too," I surrounded her in my embrace. "Do you think about me?"

"Yes," she nodded. "All the time and you know I can't lie."

"Good," I said. "It's good to know I come up in your head full of wonders."

"Filled with wonders?" She asked. "So, that's why you're always there."

I shook my head and smirked.

Maura and I went into the room and it was like all the happiness had drained from my body. Stepping into that room had never been pleasing for it only reminded me of all the things that I have and could have went through in all those days I've spent walking down the halls and into that place with my head down and my hands hidden.

Tommy got up from the bed and tried to fix himself up. Maura giggled at his actions and I rolled my eyes.

"Hello," she bent down so she'd be at level with Tommy. "How are you? My name is Maura."

"I'm good," he replied. "I'm Tommy."

"Hi, Tommy. Jane told me you had some homework, do you mind if I help," She asked and Tommy shook his head.

I watched her tell Tommy some facts about life and how it started but she didn't make it complicated for him. In fact, she explained it in a very simple way that made Tommy understand what she was saying. He even seemed interested.

She was so good with children. It was so pleasing to watch her educate him and make him smile at the same time. Maura had a way of making people happy. I could see Tommy giggling and asking questions about cavemen and monkeys. Maura answered every single question in Tommy's curious mind. He was actually listening and enjoying it. Tommy never listened.

How could anyone call her boring? Maura Isles was the exact opposite.

Their laughter had come to an end when we heard a knock on the door and my mother peeped inside. She tried to smile at us but it quickly faded every time she saw her son lying down on the hospital bed, unconscious.

Ma worked in a café at the police station and saved up every penny she earned for Frankie. Ever since Pop left us, we had nothing. He had been providing us with his job as a plumber. Ma stayed home to take care of us because my father told her that he can handle it. He said it was a man's job. He was stubborn.

"Janie, is there any news?" She asked. "Did the doctor pass by-"

She stopped when she saw another person in the room.

Maura stood up and walked towards Ma.

"Hello, you must be Jane's mother," she offered her hand. "Good evening, Mrs. Rizzoli, I'm Maura Isles, Jane's-"

She paused for a quick second.

"Friend."

"Nice to meet you," she took Maura's hand and welcomely shook it. "Call me Angela."

"Okay, Angela," she smiled. "Jane has told me much about you."

"Gee, I wish I could say the same," Ma said. "Janie is a closed case."

"Yes, I have noticed," she turned her head to me and winked. I smirked at her and crossed my arms. "We sat next to each-other in the plane to New York and spend our time together."

"Oh, did you win the contest, too?" She asked. "Did you have fun with this hot head, over hear?"

"No, I just wanted to take a nice vacation," Maura answered. "Yes, Jane's a great company to have around."

She smiled so warmly and I blushed.

"Okay, Maur! Before my mother can ask any more questions, I think it's time for us to hit the hay," I cut in and pulled on Maura's arm.

"Why would I hit any hay?" She asked.

"It's an expression, Maura."

"Oh," she said. "What about Tommy?"

"Tommy stays here with Ma," I sighed. "It's time for us to go."

"Okay, good bye Angela," she waved. "Bye, Tommy!"

* * *

Maura had offered to give me a ride back to my dark and crappy apartment. I knew I wouldn't win an argument with her so I just caved in.

We talked about our past week and what has happened during that time.

"I haven't been able to think of anything else, Maur," I breathed. "You're the only person that comes to mind."

"Isn't there anything that you can do in the hospital?" She asked.

"The truth is, there isn't. All I do is sit in that same chair all day and wait for my mother," I said as if it's no big deal. "I guess, when you just get so used to being let down, you'll stop expecting things to happen that much."

"Have I let you down?" She asked. "I haven't been so close this week. I had so much work to do and so many tests-"

"Maura, relax. You haven't let me down," I said. "You still text and call me. That's better than nothing."

"I know," she laid her head on my shoulder. "How do you cope with sitting down all day with nothing to do?"

"Flashes," I whispered. "I have flashes of scenes in my head."

"What kinds of scenes?" She asked.

"Memories of all the times I've been happy," I cooed. "And all the things that would make me happy. I imagine how I want my future to be like."

"Do I come up in your flashes?"

"Yes," I stroked her hair. "Because it's the only way for me to feel you."

Maura looked at me and bit her lip. She held my face and pulled me in closer. I gave her a soft and gentle kiss then stared into our eyes.

"Jane," she whispered. "What are we?"

"What do you think we are?"

"Humans," she said. "We are two individual humans who have developed and share mutual feelings for each other."

"Would you like to label that?" I chuckled. "I guess we're dating."

"Would that mean I have to take you on a date?" She asked. "Are you free on the 21st?"

No, I wasn't. I had to watch my brain dead brother sleep for another day.

"I'll tell you if anything comes up," I said as the car pulled over to my apartment. "Reserve that day for me."

"Will do, Jane Rizzoli," she nodded and kissed my cheek. "I'll drop by again tomorrow, if I'm not busy."

"Okay, goodbye, Maura," I whispered, it sounded near to a sob. "I'll miss you."

She held my face in her hands and pulled me in for a sweet and passionate kiss.

"I'll miss you, too," she said between my lips. "Goodbye."

I opened the door and slid out of her car then shut it close. My heart felt like it had been ripped out of my body as the car drove away. I turned around, looking up at the stars with my hands in my pocket, I walked towards the entrance and tears started to fall down on my face.

When I made it up to the apartment, I slammed the door shut and slid down to the floor with my back pressed against it. I felt empty and had the need to shout to the top of my lungs. My teeth bit down on the skin of my fist and I found it hard to breathe. I ran my fingers through my hair and grabbed it. I started pulling and tugging on them as I bit down hard on my lip to prevent myself from shouting. All I heard were the sounds of my sobs bouncing around the walls of the apartment. I hit my temples with my wrists and got up to punch the wall beside me. I pounded my fists onto the wall until they felt numb and then I hit my temples with my wrists. I missed her.

I went to the bathroom to wash my face and I looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes were already red from crying and my hair was a mess. I had scraped my lip from all the biting and my knuckles were red from the punching. Later on my knuckles would form bruises and my lip would have marks. All these were noticeable and I wouldn't bother to cover them up. I would always have an excuse, anyway, and everyone would believe it. Nobody knew what I went through.

When I went to bed, I didn't sleep. I spent three more hours hitting, screaming and crying into my pillow.

Flashes. That's how I felt happy and that's also how I felt sad. I could choose and go through transitions of happy memories but I had no control over that sadness. It would always cross my mind no matter what I do.

I never stay happy for long.

All the sad images went through my head and as they flashed more, I felt even more depressed. I felt agonizing pain.

The next day, after going to the gym, I went to the hospital to see Ma sitting down on my chair and reading a book. Curiosity was written on my face because I knew that she should be working in the café at the moment. That chair isn't the place she's supposed to be. And neither am I.

"Why are you here?" I slowly closed the door behind me. "Aren't you supposed to be serving bagels, or something?"

"Don't use that tone on me, young lady," she said. "I asked for a break because it's almost Chistmas vacation and Tommy is going to be here twenty four-seven for a couple of weeks. Him not having school and all-"

"I don't go to school anymore and you never asked for a break to take care of me," I retorted.

I didn't know what caused me to snap like that. Maybe it was because of how less effort my mother put into taking care of me. Maybe it was because I could have had a brighter future if they let me finish my education. Maybe I would be out of there, living my own life and having no problems. Maybe I wouldn't have to stay in one position the whole day to watch someone sleep and not wake up. Maybe I could be with Maura.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli, you know very well that we had to hold you back because we don't have enough expenses to cover up for your brother. I don't know why you have to blow a sudden fuse but I would like it if you could stop complaining and stop being self-"

"Selfish? You're going to say that _I'm_ selfish? You're husband is the selfish one. If he never left, maybe you wouldn't be taking fourteen hour shifts everyday. You wouldn't be holding your twenty year old daughter hostage in a hospital room. Maybe I would have finished college and had a job, by now. I'm not selfish, Ma, I never ran away when, or if, you needed me," she stayed silent and I turned back to the door then walked out. "Oh, and by the way, this is the first time I have ever complained about this. You have not heard a single whine from me regarding this topic. I have kept my mouth shut and my feelings hidden for the past two years. So, don't you say that I'm the selfish one."

Ma kept quiet and didn't reply.

"Where are you going?" She asked before I could shut the door.

"Out," I rolled my eyes. "Why, do you want me to pick up your laundry?"

She looked down and I sighed. She did.

"I'll be back before dark," I mumbled.

"Okay," she said. "I love you, Janie."

"Yeah, Ma."

I wasn't sure where to go. I never went anywhere. All the came to mind was the apartment. It's basically my apartment because nobody really used it after Frankie slipped.

When I got back to my apartment, I flicked on the TV and channel surfed through everything. I ordered some pizza because I haven't ate any lunch yet and I was starving.

I have never snapped at my mother for two years. I didn't know what happened. Was it just because I've had enough of being the last priority? Was I a priority? Was I even an _option_?

Right then, my phone buzzed and disturbed my from my of my thoughts. Maura's name was written on the screen and I quickly unlocked my phone to read her message.

"Hey!" she texted.

"Hi. You busy?" I replied.

"No, not that much. I've finished handling everything I missed out in the past weeks. What about you?"

I instantly called her after finding out she wasn't busy.

"Hello, Jane," she said. "What are you doing?"

"I'm at my apartment, right now. I kinda just, snapped at my mother," I said. "Can you come over?"

"Okay, I will," she replied. "Do you need my guidance or my comfort?"

"I need your fashion tips," I joked.

"I don't see why you would bring up your situation with your mother if you want me to educate you on fashion," she said in confusion. "Although, I do know why you would want them and I am glad you chose me to share my intelligence."

"Maura, I was kidding," I chuckled. "And, wow. Do I really dress bad?"

"Well, not that bad. A few changes need to be done, though," she answered.

"Maura, I you can't lie but you weren't supposed to answer that," I groaned.

"Then why did you ask for my assurance if you didn't want it?"

"Maur- I- I was- ugh. Just get here, please?"

* * *

I ate pizza using my hands, like any other normal person did, but Maura Isles had it different. She laid a slice on a plate and used a knife and a fork to eat it. I asked her why she would go through that much effort when she could just hold it and bite it. Maura had her reasons.

"There are more benefits in using my method," she said. "It's much more neat and you won't get your hands greasy."

"That's time wasting. Think of all the pizza you could have had if you just held it and bit on it," I said. "You could always lick the grease off of your fingers."

"Licking it off of your fingers is very unhygienic, Jane. You don't know where those fingers have been and how much bacteria it has collected," she replied. "Even if you washed you hands."

I just rolled my eyes and continued to eat my slice.

"Your situation with your mother is quite normal for your disorder," she said. "Borderline patients have a tendency to be more irritated with their families and blame them for the pain and frustrations they feel. They look back into their childhood and see all the negative things that have happened into their lives. Things like abuse, disownership, verbal abuse and many more."

This made me think about my horrible childhood, how my parents always compared me to other kids, made me feel worthless, point out all my negative traits and insecurities. Whatever I felt back then, they made me feel worse. They would blame me for everything and mumble about how much better I would be or how I could be like another person if I didn't act how I did.

And in worse cases, Pop would hit me.

"Have you ever been treated like that, Jane?" Maura asked.

"Yes," I sighed. "I don't like speaking about my childhood."

"We don't have to," she laid her hand on my knee and kissed my cheek. "As long as you're safe now."

"Mmm," I nodded. She grabbed my hand and ran her thumb through my knuckles. I winced at the slight pain of her making contact with my bruises. They were still sore from last night and hitting a punching bag over and over during the morning didn't really help.

She saw my reaction and got concerned.

"Are you okay?" She worried. "Did I hurt you?"

"No, I-"

"Where did you get these?" She saw my bruises and held my fist up to get a better look at them. "What did you do?"

"That's nothing, Maur. I was boxing this morning and I guess I hit it too much," I lied. "It's nothing."

"People with your disorder often commit to self harm," she looked me dead in the eye and looked down on my scarred lip. "What did you do?"

I stayed silent and she softened down. Maura wrapped her arms around me and gave me kisses as I tried to find it in me to tell her what happened.

I knew that if I told her, she might blame herself for my actions and push herself away. Might.

"Please tell me what happened," she cooed.

"You might leave," I said and she let me rest my head on her chest.

"I promised you that I won't," she whispered. "I don't break promises, Jane."

I nodded my head and bit my lip. The sound of her heart beating relaxed me and I wrapped my arms around her.

"I missed you too much," I said. "I felt empty and started freaking out then lost myself."

"Jane-"

"I'd rather lose myself than lose you, Maura," I cut her.

"You won't lose me," she held me tighter and I sobbed. "You never will."

"Maura, I know we're still young and I'm stupid but I don't care if I'm just really overreacting or if this is just a fucking disorder thing. I can't be without you," I sobbed. "I'm only happy when you're around and I don't know what else to do when you leave. The thought of you leaving drives me nuts, I mean, I punched a mirror because I thought I won't get to see you again."

She stroked my hair and calmed me down.

"I'm scared that every time you say goodbye, it might be the last time I'll see you. I'm not hoping for a tragedy, I just don't trust myself when it comes to living."

"I understand, Jane," she really did. "I know that it's hard for you to cope with people leaving. I know that it tears you apart and I won't tell you to stop. I won't tell you to stop worrying about these things because I know you can't control yourself from doing them. You have the right to worry, Jane, and I won't tell you that it's wrong. It's also not right. But I'm here for you, Jane. I'm here and I'm not leaving. I promise."

She wiped my tears away and held my hand.

"Maybe we can say something else, other than goodbye," she said. "We can work something out."

"No. Let's not work it out. It'll come naturally and we won't even notice," I whispered. "I'm a roller coaster of emotions, Maura."

She chuckled and I laid down on her lap.

"I don't even know why you like me," I said. "That's all we want, right? Someone who'll pay attention to every detail and tell us that we're beautiful."

Maura nodded slightly and leaned in closer. Our faces were centimeters apart and our noses were touching. I could smell her vanilla scented perfume and cherry lip gloss. I felt her warn breath on my lips and her breathing was relaxed. I felt her hands grabbing my jacket and our lips were touching slightly.

We closed our eyes and she whispered, "All I really want is you, a hazardous roller coaster filled with ups, downs, you can break at any moment."

"Dangerous," I whispered between her lips.

"In all the right ways," she closed the gap.


End file.
